Pregnant woman goes into a bar...

And she wasn't even drinking. Good grief.

So speaking of being pregnant, I was curious the other day if anyone had done a book on hunting for a job while pregnant. Couldn't find much -- maybe it's not worth a book. But since that's my world these days, I'm interested. There is a lot of interesting stuff out there in the blogosphere -- it seems the consensus advice is to not mention it too early on but to be upfront about it with the hiring manager if you're moving along in the interview process. Of course, after a series of interviews with one really interesting company recently, I figured I should say something, I did, and now I haven't heard a word in nearly a month. Sigh.


Up to this point (I'm 30 weeks, so into my third trimester) I've trust my gut and mentioned it if it came up (Like, one interview pleasantly asked 'oh, how many kids do you have?') or if I felt that I would be talking to this person again in the next few months. Other times, I've just not said anything -- especially in the event of a first interview. I've been lucky enough not to gain a ton (third kid and all), so I can kind of hide it under winter clothing for a long time. (I know no one can legally discriminate against a job candidate for pregnancy, but geez, how would you ever be able to prove it?)

But now I wonder what is "right". I'm seven months along. I'm all belly and it's harder and harder to miss. My interview "outfit" now consists of some fitted black maternity dress pants, long Ann Taylor sweaters (non-maternity, but a size up or two from what I'd usually wear) and a non-maternity black suit coat that I have no prayer or plan to button.  I also like to accessorize with scarves (it's January in Chicago, after all), so the belly is sort of hidden. I think I just look kind of plump now. Or like I just hit a buffet, a really big one. Or I swallowed a pot-bellied pig.

The other day I was in a "first" interview situation -- though I've had conversation with this company before and would LOVE to work for them -- and I worried whether I should say something? But then I get worried that I'll be shooting myself in the foot by bringing it up. I asked the interviewer about her hiring timetable, and it sounds awfully close to when I give birth. Oh man. So I'm hoping the right thing to do would  be to see if she calls me back and then disclose it. Same with some other positions at different companies for which I've interviewed recently.

But that raises another question, for which I haven't yet found a good answer. No one wants to hire someone who's gonna start and then disappear for three months, right? I don't blame them. So as a mama to a newborn coming in March, what do I agree to, should an offer be near? Do I offer to take a short leave, a sort-of leave (like work 1-2 days a week?) or what? Of course, this is assuming that I'll even get an offer in the next couple of months.That's looking more and more like a giant "IF" now. I think I need some chocolate cake, be right back.

Yum, better. Hunting for a job while pregnant kind of sucks sometimes, but other times I have to just chuckle. Yesterday I waddled into a networking-type breakfast and someone said "oh, wow, look what happened to you." It's like um, yeah. Then there's the snow and ice and trying to "dress up" while wearing sensible-enough shoes that won't kill me on ice and snow. And the fun of squeezing into a very finite, appropriate interview wardrobe.

But there are also things that make me laugh about the whole thing. Like this morning, at the breakfast, one of my first thoughts was "oh crap, they only have fruit and pastries!" Usually this group puts on a full breakfast with eggs and the works. Damn. Like this should be what I'm thinking about.

Or there's sitting in an interview while baby girl kicks the poo outta me and I try to keep a straight face. And not gasp. Or there was the time that I was brought into someone's office and it smelled like butt. I was like, you're going to leave me here??? Ugh. Then there's this week, with my stupid back just aching and I've been really trying not to grimace at people. "Hi, nice to meet you, no, I'm not making a horrible face at you, it's just my aching back! Oh this baby!" Haha. Another landmine: "no, I didn't just toot." *innocent whistle* OK, that hasn't happened this time around -- though it did during my last pregnancy at work, and I was MORTIFIED.

On the plus side -- perks include wearing yoga pants all the time and weighing less because I never eat out anymore. So there, there's my silver lining. That, and I can have a drink in a bar in about two months without someone looking at me funny. Yay! Now, someone tell me how that pregnant lady had the stamina to be up and out in a bar at midnight... I want some of that!