Really trying here, folks...

Warning: This will be a rant, so stop reading if you have enough crap on your plate.


I cannot figure out why after two months of unemployment I haven't received a dime in unemployment benefits. The state of Illinois system is not helping. The web site provides a customer service phone number that is busy all the time. As in busy signal, like we used to get in the 1970s. The local office in my 'hood provides a phone number with what seems like 400 prompts before it throws you into a black hole, er, I mean, general mailbox. My official letters state my benefits are being withheld because "a determination is pending." Of what? Why? I can't even get to a human being to find out. My family still needs to eat, you know? If anyone has any suggestions out there on how to deal with the unemployment office, I'd love to hear them. It is humbling enough to be unemployed without feeling like I'm groveling for unemployment payments.

At some point I should just laugh, right? This most recent letter, not the first I've received, comes on top of a sleep-deprived week thanks to the little toddler man who's getting more teeth, poor bug, and therefore sleep-depriving his parents. I fully recognize that this has a negative effect on my a. mood and b. ability to rationalize without flying into a tizzy or bursting into tears. The bathroom sink clogged up this morning at 5 a.m., just hours before another job interview. Thank goodness for my husband for juggling that and my toddler while I tried to find accommodating, interview-worthy clothing to wear around my increasingly pregnant torso. (Even my husband is acknowledging how large I'm getting.) (I should mention he is also hiding in the basement far away from my moods, poor guy.) And the zipper of my warmest coat busted while walking around the frozen Loop today, making me even grouchier and colder. And I sound like I'm smoking a pack a day again thanks to a lovely and noisy cold that has settled into my chest. UGH.

I know, I know, people have real problems and I should shut it. I can hear it now. I have a roof over my head still, there's food in the cupboard, etc., I know. I'm an ass to complain. But man oh man, someone send some of this damn holiday cheer I keep hearing about all the time my way. Because I am trying to be a big girl and not cry.